Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Actual Craigslist posting... Had to share... May 16, 2009

I got this from a friend the other day, and I was unable to copy it here, so I am going to re-type it so you all can get a chuckle out of it like I did...




Now, WARNING, if you are offended by farting stories, you should NOT read this.....carry on if you are brave....



Titled:



TO THE WOMAN THAT CRAPPED IN MY CAR..... (NE Portland) (Under men seeking woman on Craigslist on 1-25-09)

We met on Craigslist, so I am hoping that this post finds you. I know that it could quite possibly be the most humiliating first date that you have ever been on, but I am willing to look past that.

I thought we had chemistry sitting at McMenamins sharing that basket of Cajun Tots while drinking the Terminator Stout. I really felt like there was a connection there. I found you to be intelligent and witty and looked forward to further conversation with you.

At some point in life, everyone has gambled on a fart and lost. It just happened to be on a first date in the passenger seat of my car. Please dont' feel bad. The package I sent you with Pepto the next day and the note that said "First dates are always a crap shoot. Call me" was meant to be funny, not offensive.


I have gambled on a fart and lost on mulitple occasions. The first time I did it was very memorable. It happened when I was five and sitting on my uncle's lap. I am lactose intolerant, but love cheese. I probably win 95% of the time, but I don't think anyone wins 100% of the time. That's why they call it "gambling". I'm the last person to judge you for crapping your pants. In fact, I am impressed by your boldness. The timing on the other hand, could have been a tad bit better....like when you're not sitting on a heated leather seat...


What I am trying to say is that if you want to go out again, I would be more than happy to take you someplace where we can get a meal that is high in fiber, and less taxing on the digestive tract.


I await your call,

Tad

P.S. - If you shat yourself on purpose to end the evening early....Touche'....

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